1. cramps are a bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Mother nature needs to take a chill pill on this monthly "gift" she be handing out!!!!!!!
or rather...maybe i need to get on a pill other than tylenol or aleve or advil, maybe a BC pill so my period will stop flowing!!!
because the torture i have been through since wednesday is indescribable i tell you!!! lets just say, when i get married or get a bobo or whatever, they'll need a special manual and level of tolerance to handle me when i am having cramps because there'll be some screaming, some cussing, some breaking, and some loud crying and some downright meanness!!!
I can't even begin to imagine how i'll be when i'm in labor, it will NOT be a pretty sight fo sho. :(

2. ok so when i say i want to chop off all my hair, nobody should give me side eye.... I was in one spot from 11am till 9pm all in the name of hair braiding!!!! best believe i am carrying these braids till September!!!! my 9 hours shall not be in vain!!!

3. my birthday is in like 3 weeks!!!! Thank God for his grace thus far. haven't really figured out what i'll do sha but hopefully it goes well. :)

4. If i do not go shopping within the next week i'll definitely lose my mind!!!!!! I can't remember the last time i went shopping :( I need some retail therapy mehn..... maybe i'll go tomorrow.

5. I insist that i did not run that red light!!!! it was yellow!!!!! i had already entered the intersection when it turned red!!!!!!!!! these people should not send any ticket in the mail. LORD PLEEEASSSEEE!!!!! I hate giving my money to the state!!!! :( well i guess its better than the cops giving me the ticket, that one ehn..i woulda just paid $250. so yay!

biko biko biko...... did you guys read Solomon Sydelle's post about that nonsense girl that was chooking head inside Ifeoma's (my name sake :)) marraige??
all in the name of paper????
bia, that girl needs some serious itali on her bum bum.....lol

ndi mmadu di njo (people are wicked) i tell you,
they should better call immigration on her ass, or pata pata do restraining order.

See this is why i don't like being nice to people sometimes, and don't like when I see people being nice to people,
call me crazy or whatever but one too many times, I have seen cases of family members being nice and then the IDIOTS they ended up being nice to just did some very drastic, wicked, horrible and evil things
talk about taking people as your own children and helping them out only for them to open their mouth and say rubbish about you and even try to hurt you physically and spiritually.....
This is why i have rules:
IT IS NOT NECESSARY TO BE NICE TO SOMEBODY!! sometimes people have issues and they come to you for help, if it is not convenient for you, biko rapuba (please forget it)
IT IS NOT THAT CRUCIAL!!
and if people do not ask for your help, do NOT go out of your way to do sister/brother amakamife
even bible talk say, ask and it shall be given unto you, seek and you shall find. Bible no tok say "don't ask, just sit there, make brother/sister amakamife come read your mind, come dey help you
biko, life na choice.... if you dont want to help somebody, you dont deserve to be crucified for it, sometimes, its best to say eeeyyyaa, nwannem ndo, ebezina and MOVE ON!!!!!

Second rule:
When I get married, to each man his own biko, no husbands sister's brother's wife's aunty's uncle inside the matter
my family is me, my husband and my pikins, again, God get sense come tok for bible say "and a man shall leave his papa and mama, come join to him wife"
I have also witnessed first hand where extended family and their wahala almost causes irreconcilable differences and irreparable damage!
make sister Ngozi find her square root and brother Tunde find him own cube root and everybody tanda on their own, then yawa no go gas.

I kno have been ranting, biko pardon me...lol plenty things dey my mind this morning and i will yan my shursh mind oh.

I AM TIRED OF PEOPLE FEELING LIKE THEY ARE DOING YOU A FAVOR BY BEING YOUR FRIEND.
omo you must have fallen down and injured your medulla oblongata (abi whatever it is called) because you must not be thinking straight.
some people just want you to pretend for them and kiss their feet and not tell them your mind when something is bugging you about them. biko no be wetin my mama teach me at all!!!!

when you talk now it is "iphy you are disrespecting me, iphy you are insulting me"
not every damn thing is an insult!!! when you talk i'll sit there like mumu and listen but when i talk it is an insult?? biko get out of here with that stupid mentality...
and then playing the "but i did so, so and so thing for you, after all i have done for you, what of that day i gave you this, what of that day i gave you that?"
as if me too i havent done some things for you, as if you were doing all those things for me and expecting me to pay you back when something goes wrong....
tchewww.....
i laugh in french. rubbish!

All these long lost cousins should stop sending me facebook friend requests please!!!!
I saw your ass briefly in 2008 december and you did not say one word to me and you kept staring at me and saying God knows what to yourself and giving me side eye,
biko we have nothing to talk about and probably never will.....
do not send me a freaking friend request, if i havent accepted your friend request in six months, do not resend it before i swear for you...rubbish!


whatever we sow in this life, we'll definitely reap.


for the record,
I am not an angry Black/African/Nigerian woman but sometimes i need to rant so that i won't go to jail for taking my anger out on the general public in broad daylight as a result of built up vexation.

I am still a very sweet person inside. :D

bear with moi,
Iphy.